Archive for

Longing

Posted on October 28, 2011

I have no regrets about our summer, looking back I can replay so many shimmering memories of swimming with the girls, hunting for sticks to ‘marsh the mallows‘, and diving beneath the sparkling lake water to scour the shallow shores for driftwood. Each day has a soundtrack that makes me proud as the echoes play of having arrived at milestones hand-in-hand: swimming without life jackets, jumping off the back of the boat into bottomless bays and speeding down the treefort slide. I’ll admit that each autumn brings a pang of sorrow as I put away frocks that have run out of sisters to share them, wee little bits of memory-charged fabric go to a donate pile or a reverence heap. This year though, this…

+Read more

When it Counts

Posted on October 25, 2011

I’ve made no secret that my ability to gracefully balance between the work realm and the craft table is a myth. I’ve tried to do it all, I’ve sobbed at the futility of it, but I’ve also realized something—no one does everything perfectly. We all feel less-than at some point or another. We working moms don’t have it tougher than working women, stay at home moms or guys. We just have it different. The times when I feel like I am getting the hang of it (this applies to working or parenting) are when I am completely there. It can be deeply moving or just a relief.  Yesterday I had one such moment. Sean was running an errand that bled into a work thing;…

+Read more

After the Ball

Posted on October 24, 2011

I came without companion or acquaintance, the familiar path of finding one kindred soul and clinging to them never showed itself. Once I realized I could either melt into the shadowy corners or step forward and make something out of this time away from home, a new gear opened. I stared down the paneled rooms with their showy chandeliers and rose to stand to all of my five feet ten inches and walked straight into the experience. These events are dizzying by necessity; sessions scheduled back-to-back, professional suitors inserting themselves between panel and bathroom, coffee and break-out session. The air was charged with an excitement, but every so often I could feel a crackle of something else, ferocity? The collision of so many aspirations…

+Read more

All of Me and MORE

Posted on October 20, 2011

I am typing this on a train to New York City. It’s times like these when my sense of adventure and my comfort in being a tomboy collide. I like wearing cords and boots to work and balancing on curbs and running from point A to B, even if I’m in heels instead of boots. There is also a side of me that loves room service and the anonymity of travel, the shedding of identity and agility of confidence—away from the day-to-day you can rewrite the script. Fifteen minutes in to the ride, I texted a photo to Sean in reply to his text letting me know the girls were just waking up. “Little bit of me, little bit of the view.” I can…

+Read more

Highs and Lows

Posted on October 17, 2011

This morning I read a beautifully written post that, as happens frequently with Mom-101, coursed its way through familiar grooves in my working-mom scar tissue. It was only an hour before that I’d been at the dentist, Finley in tow, to have Briar seen. A tooth ache last Thursday led to a Friday morning call, Friday afternoon antibiotic and a Monday morning appointment. Under any other circumstances this would have been a huge win. Follow through, organization, resolution! Unfortunately the I-got-this attitude that so often sees me through, came right up and kicked me in the ass. The pineapple and coconut gum numbing stuff wasn’t working, the anesthesia didn’t seem to take, and then Finley spied the needle. Briar began to buck, tears streamed…

+Read more

%d bloggers like this: