The Wink

Break My Stride

I thought parenting was humbling, the flashes of thinking I’d be able to do it all, the fantasies of avoiding the ruts, the memories of choices my parents made that I questioned. Six years on the doing side of parenting and I realize how often we have to react as opposed to decide, that even [...]

Misfit

I remember as a little girl (it started in fifth grade), I just wanted to fit in. I wanted to have the right clothes, ride the cool bike, say the right things, of course I never did. I was different. I didn’t love dolphins, didn’t like dresses and when it came time to play outside, I [...]

Get Your Seek On

Every once in a while I realize that without our girls, I might never reset. Remember hide and seek? Remember believing that each new day held the promise of something worth squealing for? Remember when you didn’t hide yourself? Remember when you lived without hesitation? Do you remember why you stopped? Go live like this!

Perspective

You know that thing you do, the thing where you cling tight to something about yourself and assume it exists for others. Usually it’s something awful, like you are unattractive or inferior. Maybe you’re on the other side and you know you are brilliant and trust everyone else thinks the same. As I inch closer to [...]

Angles of guile

I saw a tweet that made me smile, like ear-to-ear, nodding and then saying “Yes,” out loud, smiling. See, I have discovered that we all have our days. We all feel ugly, fat, old, or just less-than. Fine, noted, moving on. What good does staying on that side of things get us? Do we get extra [...]

In another’s eyes

Each morning and each night I face myself in the mirror and interpret what I see in different ways. I am not ashamed to say that I vastly prefer the moments when my reflection lifts me, sends my shoulders back and this crooked smile of mine higher. I love being able to smile back at [...]

Redefining

My last post was about a time long passed, a period in my youth (am I old enough to say “my youth?” Shit.) I was referring to a time when I let someone speak for me, when a person said something about what I ended or what I was worth and I took it as [...]

Wa-da!

Despite the fact that “my kid says…” is generally only cute to the parents and the ass-kissing people in the lives of the parents, my kid says the cutest thing. Often. It’s really just this one that get me lately. Fin will walk into a room, throw her arms wide and sing, “Wa-da!” which is [...]

Shoots despite ice

We’re in the midst of the Adirondack winter. Late January always teases, making me think we’re rounding a corner, when really it’s just new waves of ice and snow. Mornings bleed together, dark and frigid, and then night comes. I find myself wondering if life is suspended in ice, if all my hopes will somehow be [...]

Waffling Part 2

When last I wrote: I also peed. A little, tiny bit, but still. Pee. So I kept running, until… And so as I rounded the corner and began running in earnest, I realized just how raspy my throat was and a sense of panic almost set in as I wondered how long until I go water. [...]