Posts from the “Roar” Category

The Power of Language

Posted on September 30, 2017

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never break me.   The rhyme rattles around in my memory, the words a threadbare security blanket I used in grade school to keep the tears from breaking through. I had an image to uphold. I notice the same tendency in Finley. She doesn’t want to be seen upset and she works hard at it, sometimes even here at home. Tears are for private. Finley is acutely aware of the power of language. She has the words that she’s collected and categorized as hurtful. She bans them from her vocabulary and is vigilant about defending anyone who she witnesses them being used on at school. I try to model behavior that she can be…

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Life Isn’t the Same After #WonderWoman

Posted on June 5, 2017

Saturday afternoon I used my phone to buy seven tickets for a Sunday matinee of Wonder Woman. It was, quite honestly, a pain in the ass because the Regal app was persnickety and I didn’t have my wallet so I had to borrow a card from Sean. Sometimes this sort of thing would annoy me and send me into a “Well, I guess it isn’t meant to be” defeat. Not this time. It was too important that my contribution to the first weekend of the movie be recorded. Talk with your wallet. Stand up for things that matter. It was the same thing with backing Rebecca Woolf’s Kickstarter campaign for Pans. I want movies made with girls in mind as more than arm candy, victims…

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A Game of Chicken with Weight

Posted on February 12, 2017

I have obsessed about weight. In college I abused laxatives. I’ve battled with disordered eating. I said hateful things to myself. I compared myself to women in magazine, classmates, strangers, and, quite possibly, people who didn’t even exist. The lengths I took to keep the bar of how I was supposed to look and what I should weigh just out of reach was staggering. I made it impossible to succeed. As I raise three daughters I feel terror because of all the very real threats in the world, hating ourselves can be the most devastating. I watch them grow, their shapes changing constantly, and each new contour and curve makes me fall more intensely in love with who they are. They have never had a…

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MLK isn’t a Holiday

Posted on January 16, 2017

If anything it is a call-to action. Pithy quotes and puffed chests, effusive adoration of a man on a single day a year and deafening silence on those days not dedicated to his memory. Harsh? Perhaps, but I’ve been guilty myself, so I lump myself right in there with the rest. Despite people pinning the shit out of quotes about sticking with love, darkness not driving out darkness, the time always being right to do what’s right, I have seen more All Lives Matter and Blue Lives Matter proclamations than I have seen public support of black lives. Martin Luther King Jr., also said, “In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.” He was…

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When I Can Choose, I Do

Posted on January 11, 2017

Sadness isn’t always something I can control. There are periods in my life when I remember being slick with a sadness that I could not shake. Other times, though, it’s been a choice. I’ve luxuriated in sorrow, rolling up good and tight in the all-consuming oblivion of it. Last night as I sat down to watch President Obama give his farewell speech I was numb. The first few moments as I watched him walk out on stage I shook with fear that he would be assassinated. Dramatic? Sure, but lately the political and social realm has teetered toward the inconceivable. As he began talking I settled in, listening and remembering watching him be sworn in with the girls in our laps. As it really dawned…

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